Every once in a while...which is probably every few days for everyone else, but feels like five years to me....I really get tired of this. I miss so much stuff. I thought I missed a lot of things when I was in college. Lies! I miss so much now...and I can't push any harder than I am now.
I've been miserably half asleep for 24 hours. Finally have enough pain control to look at FB and congratulate my friends who are now a couple, be happy about a baby's change in health.....
but it is so hard. I cannot express how hard it is to miss all this stuff. I want to see the new happiness shining in my friends' eyes, see the baby I have seen so many photos but not seen. I want to do so much stuff. And I just can't. And it breaks my heart. I know you guys each know that I would be there if I could, and desperately want to. I am so sorry that I am not. Know that I am celebrating here on my couch.
I want those shots to work. Enough so that I can at least stand car rides places. I am ok with not being able to do other things...but I want to be able to ride in a car and sit at someone's home. Maybe I will get the med combo right, somehow....
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