I have had about a week and some odd days of "good" health. Better, maybe, than in a year or possibly longer. (???)
My pain is less. When I started the methotrexate, the larger joints (knees, ankles, hips) did not "seem" to hurt, while my smaller joints (jaw, fingers, wrists, toes) were full of glass shards. Ouch. At this point, I seem to mainly be getting a dull, annoying ache that only needs breakthrough medications if I am trying to rest. If I am moving about, the pain is within the ignoring stage.
Nausea. Nausea is still an issue. Currently I feel ick, and I am waiting for some nausea meds to work. The nausea hits me when I do something too soon and/or too long. I should be asleep now, which I am sure is aggravating the nausea, but I am not sleeping very well.
I seem to be less tired overall, with the exception of having little to no muscle mass and being easily tired due to that fact.
My "brain fog"---RA/Fibro memory issues---is driving me mad. I can't remember very well what happened from one day to the next. Mainly minor things, but it is still distressing. Perhaps that is another explanation for my homeschool days when I could not remember what I learned the day before.
The idea that I am better, or could possibly be better than I am now, is terrifying. MTX takes three months to hit peak therapeutic levels. I am on the third injection.
I can't feature having the chance to live again---even if it was to stay at this level. I managed to drive a car last week and visit a dear friend/"sister" who lives close...and then Sunday (I am sure of this), Hubby and I went to visit another friend/"sister" who lives close by. How can I be doing this?
I had about accepted the fact that my health was not going to ever permit me to do anything. That I might be lucky enough to see one person at their home every six months. Two different homes in one week. I really, honestly can't believe that I did that.
I don't know if this mild remission will last, get stronger or what...I am ever so grateful for a mild break from misery. If, and that is a big, enormous IF, I manage to improve beyond this, and remain stable for three months, I might see if a light duty home health position would be an option. I am not going to even think about it beyond that statement.
How did I get this chance to live this last week and some days? Sorry if this post wanders and such...still having a hard time with this improvement.
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