The thing about RA that really "kills" me is how it stops my education. I am indeed fulfilling one wish of going further with my own personal studying of the Bible, God and what solid authors have written.
I miss college. I love school; I had planned on becoming a professor at my local college. Weeks before my RA erupted, I told St Martin's University that I would need to work another year to save up some funds to continue my nursing degree.
I did contact the nursing administrator some months ago stating my current illness (which she had heard through the grapevine--certainly fine by me. Obviously I write about it all over the internet.). She was super understanding, and really still wanted me to come, to adjust the course load so I could manage. Oh. My heart just aches from the lack of being able to actively be a nurse and to be a student.
It is funny how what we plan goes askew. I had maybe thought Mark and I would be parents by now...that I would have a BSN, be out of school and work raising kids. However, as yet, I am here. Studying God's Word, learning to be patient, give up many things until a time when it may work.
We must all be patient. We can hold onto dreams, but we mustn't force dreams to happen. Any time I have tried to do that, or witnessed others doing so, the dream goes wrong. Be patient. Listen to God. Wait for His timing.
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